"Can you entertain yourself tomorrow?" I asked as I put down the letter from Jaubert that I had been frowning at for the past few minutes. I'll have to sort out those mine contracts with him tomorrow. The Council can be so damn annoying. I looked at An, I didn't even have time to change yet. I just went to my table and started reading these letters.
"You think I can't last a few hours without your gracious presence?" she hasn't even touched her mail, she's sitting on the couch and watching the fish in the aquarium. Again. It fascinates her so much, she pays more attention to it than to me. I'm slowly getting jealous of it, it’s just an aquarium. A decoration I didn't ask for. And she acts like it’s somehow important and I should care about it.
"I'll be gone all day." I scribbled a message for Basil on a clean piece of paper and got up. I would expect her to ask what I'm going to do, but she's been lost in her own thoughts since we got back. Either she's still angry because I'm doing what I want and I'm not going to apologize for it, or she's thinking about something. The latter scares me a lot more. I understand the first one.
"So?" with her head tilted, she observes one of the yellow fish hiding in the plants. The only little creature in the whole aquarium caught her attention a few months ago. I don't have the heart to tell her that the fish won't last long and she shouldn't get used to it. They are so horribly overbred, and it's quite possible that the next time she's here, the fish will be gone. "I know how to entertain myself, I've managed without you. And with any luck I'll be able to just stay in bed. Unlike you, I'm on a vacation."
"I just don't want you sitting in front of the aquarium all day." I sat between her and the water tank, blocking her view of the yellow fish. I want some of her attention for myself. She's here for me, isn't she?
"Why? It’s easy to think, looking at it."
"Really? And what did you come up with?" I asked with interest. Her thoughts usually go in a completely different direction than mine. I try not to focus on work, she's usually thinking about complex theories and why she doesn't think they'll work or she's thinking of something amazingly mundane that I would never have thought of.
"I named the little yellow fish Achita." she announced proudly. That's exactly the train of thought I could never have guessed.
"By that fruit?" at Lemford -and I think only there- a sweet achitan fruit is grown, almost the same color as the fish in my aquarium. Bright yellow with a slight hint of orange. An nodded with a smile. "That's adorable." I laughed. I could never bring myself to care enough about the creatures in the aquarium to name them. They are simply part of the room's furnishings. They swim there all day and leave me alone. Thinking about it, I don't even know who feeds them or when. I should probably know. Maybe Basil does? He comes here with letters and fish food? "You should probably know that those fish don't last very long." I really don't want her to be disappointed when the fish bites it.
"Don't be such a grump, it might just be a fish, but it might have a nice name. It won't change the world, but I just like it." she wrapped her long hair around her hand, laid down on my lap and let her hair down. The whole long strand of silken flood slowly slides down my leg. "You wanted to know what I was thinking about and that’s it. You should know that your little fish has a name, at least one of them. I don't know why you treat them like they're not yours."
That's exactly what I wanted to know and she didn't disappoint me. I would never have thought that he was thinking of such a thing. I am actually pleased, it's so far away from everything we deal with all the time. I wonder if she thinks about other completely ordinary things. "Do you ever think about children?" I asked, my hand buried in the long, soft hair. Until I met her, I didn't even think about such a thing myself, but a lot has changed since then. It's one of those ideas that I pushed aside because it didn't feel important or timely. She changed all that. If I can imagine a family with anyone, it's her.
"I'm busy with adults so, I try not to think about it, it usually leads me to everything that happened in Tre'Asco, the unnaturally small corpses and," she stopped mid sentence as my eyebrows shot up. I didn't expect this answer either. Not in the least. "You mean children… like our children… yours and mine." she elaborated slowly. "Well… that makes a lot more sense." she added, probably just to herself.
I am completely at a loss for words. That's not exactly the reaction I was hoping for. I'd rather hear no than this awkward silence. I'm not sure exactly what that would mean for me, but at least I'd have my answer. Andrea frowned, looked out the window and back at me before laughing softly. I wonder what amused her. It's a pretty reasonable question. We should both at least think about it, although she's probably in no rush, given her age. And I honestly wouldn't rush it either. "It might surprise you, but I'm thinking about that too." she looked up at me. Her dark eyes smile beautifully. "I'm like you, the youngest of the family, and someone keeps reminding me. Technically, I have two and a half centuries to figure out who I pass the crown to." hard to believe that she is the youngest somewhere. She still didn't answer what I was really asking. Does she even want kids? That she should have her own heirs is nice, but maybe she doesn't want it that way. Her uncles don't have kids either, so what would make her do that? "It's a really nice idea. I think our children would be sickeningly cute. Especially if they had your eyes."
"My eyes?" I am honestly surprised. Why does she like that colour so much? If anything, it's completely out of line. Because of that colour, I don't fit in perfectly. So why keep it? "I like yours much better. Dark and full of love." but she is right that our children would be hideously cute. Especially if they inherited her traits.
They will be if we ever get that far. If I ever live to see it. Like lately I'm not even a little bit sure what the next day has in store for me.
A knock on the door brought me back to reality. I got up and went to see what was going on again. I probably won't have a quiet afternoon. Ever since I took the crown it never is. Basil brings me a message from my father. It's a little reminder that he wants to see me tonight, talk to me over dinner. With a sigh I told him to confirm it. I wonder what he wants. Mainly because of Catarina and her message. Ang just showed up and didn't try anything? But I don't want to go there one bit. I just want to be with her, alone. Talking about a future that might not even happen. I have the right to plan one. After all, I can lie to myself that something awaits me and that I have a future. "I think you're going to have to entertain yourself tonight as well." I announced on my way to her, back to the sofa.
"Why?" she asked dispassionately, as if she already knew the answer.
“I need to talk to father."
"About what?"
"I," I stopped. "if I knew, I wouldn't have had to go there."
"Perfect," she hummed. "so he wants to talk to you, not you to him, and besides, it's not true, even if you knew that, he'd still want to talk to you. Ed loves speeches and the sound of his own voice..."
"Ed, huh?" I frowned. Why does she call him that, father doesn't like it when someone shortens his name. Actually, hardly anyone does. Mother doesn’t, although I'd say she probably doesn’t for other reasons. Like Edgar sounds a lot stricter and she thrives on that. Why are the two still together?
"What?"
"You have to explain it to me. Father is Ed to you, Emmett is Em, only I'm always Steven?" it gets personal. How long do I have to be in her life to deserve a nickname?
"Both Edgar and Emmett are annoyingly long names that I hate repeating. But I like Steven. It suits you." she smiled with that perfectly sweet smile. "So for how much longer do I have you Steven?"
Well, at least she likes my name, I could have done worse. "Does it suit me?" I laughed. She just nodded with that same sweet smile still on her lips. I leaned over to look at the clock on the wall behind her. “For about two hours.”
"I can work with that." she quickly stood up, grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. "Wear something comfortable." she laughed and let go of me again. What’s on her mind this time? We can spend our allotted time here, at least I would rest… or not, but I would definitely have fun. "You'll enjoy it." she commented on my incredulous look and went into the bedroom.
I watched her carefully as she dressed, leaning against the door. She's not going to tell me where we're going, or she'd lead with that. I can only guess. She put on pants, a tight tank top and a leather jacket with a high collar. All in brilliant white. Before she braided her hair, I dressed similarly, only swapping her light colours for much more practical darks. She complains about how everyone around her is obsessed with white and she wears it all the time. If only that told me what she's up to, I'm sure she's got nothing to do all week. So this will be her idea of fun. Which can be basically anything. From visiting some club, through her favourite and perfectly calm places, to some kind of fight. Judging by the tank top, it's definitely going to be a fight.
The round hall welcomed us with a sharp light from several large lamps, resembling reflectors. I assume it’s not real. It will just be spheres, anchored in space by magic. There are no windows and I can't see any doors, but that doesn't mean there aren't any. Her world is full of illusions. Immortals have incredibly vivid imaginations. They can dream up anything, a new world with rules that don't make the slightest sense elsewhere and with the help of their power, they will bring it all to life. It's just covered in not very interesting colours.
I looked around again. The stark white walls and wooden floor, although perfectly level, are completely lost among the several huge portals that surround us. "Pick one." she nudged me with her hands on hips. So this is her idea of fun? An artificially constructed world that we can escape to for a few hours? It is quite strikingly reminiscent of their Tournament. I reached out to the first portal right in front of me, heavy rain and a muddy road is all I can see. Even so, it's enough to make me sure I don't want to go there. Another one of them leads to some kind of ship that doesn't really appeal to me either.
"Where are we?" I asked, mesmerized by a colourful cave, dozens of crystals growing out of the stone, the light passing through making them literally glow. I almost decided, when I was put off by a loud howl. Whatever is going on there, I don't want to know.
"The important thing is where we will be. So… pick one." she urged me. I don't want to pick anything that looks like I’ll have a lot of work with it. An empty street in some port city looks tempting enough for me to give it a shot. I mean, what could anyone want from us at the port? I didn't wait for her to tell me about it, I passed.
I didn't even have time to look around properly and I already heard someone's angry scream. Andrea laughed, grabbed my hand and ran. I can't even get my bearings, we turned, ran through a small garden, jumped over a low wall and turned again. In other words, I couldn't have chosen worse. This is definitely not going to be the leisurely stroll through the heated city that I had hoped for and was already looking forward to. This frantic dash through narrow aisles stacked with boxes and their owners is the exact opposite of what I want. It should have occurred to me. I bet it would be more peaceful in that cave. Fuck! She zigzags gracefully in front of me between all the obstacles, avoiding stalls and merchants, and I have a lot to do not to get tangled in one of the pieces of cloth hanging across the street.
A truly excellent choice.
"This is your idea of fun?" completely out of breath I leaned against the high wall as did she when she finally stopped.
"Yours isn't?" she threw her arms up excitedly to show me the beauty of the place. The bright walls of the buildings and the hot climate are just the beginning of it all. We are standing in a large market, dozens of colourful stalls hide treasures, for which traders try to set a much higher price than they seem to have. Some of them shout in our language, others speak something similar to languages from the southern continent. So we are probably somewhere in Slurzin, surrounded by long, sandy plains on one side and the sea on the other. The heat here is replaced by even higher temperatures and the unbearably arid plains of sand are already waiting for their victims. Not that those are the only things to watch out for, the inhabitants aren't any more pleasant or reliable than the harsh climate, and for that matter, there's sure to be a host of beasts and other monsters waiting outside the city walls that just tremble to tear us apart. That doesn't inspire much confidence in me either, but at least here, where I'm standing, there's a pleasant shade from palm trees, the only plants crazy enough to grow taller than a meter. "I thought you'd run faster since you're so much taller."
"It's not my fault you're so tiny. I would run faster if you prepared me for it.” I snapped my head back to the commotion behind us. And which I assume will soon catch up with us. "So what are we doing here?" and what should we do? What should I prepare for?
"You always ask me what happened, when and why, I thought I could show you for once." she leaned against the cool stones under the small canopy next to me. It's hard to believe that anything can be a little cold in this heat. Chilling, just like her touch. It must be her own memory, it dawned on me, probably too late. “We have to get inside, behind this wall. The gate is on the other side of that complex.” she was interrupted by three loud jingles. It must be announcing something, but what? “After the sound is heard a third time, the main gate will be lowered and we will not be able to get there.” she smiled at me challengingly. "I would challenge you to a race, but you run so slowly..." she raised her hand, and everything around us fell silent. It stopped. "We didn't get a chance to face each other in the Tournament. It's quite a shame, don't you think?" she gives me time to think. She wants me to accept it, she is so competitive. And I must be too, because I really want to. I'm tempted and I run quite faster than her, but she knows her way around here. Immortals always have the advantage on their side. They always know exactly where they are and what is expected of them. But Damien lost. So why couldn’t she?
"And after I win again? What will be my reward?” I brushed my hair from my forehead and came to her. According to the watch on my wrist, I have enough time for our little race. "You tell me about immortality, everything."
"Well," she smirked. "not that you have any chance," she folded her arms. "but if I win, you will stay with me all evening and all night."
"It's not exactly fair, you know the place." I objected. It must be her memory and she seems pretty confident that she won't have to tell me anything at all. In addition, it seems quite unpredictable here, crowds of people walking here and there, stalls, austere houses and clutter take up space between them, and the rest is filled by giant palm trees and the ever-present lines of fabric swaying with the wind. Running anywhere in such conditions will be a nuisance. And that's not even counting the hot air and sand in it.
"Don't worry, I'll give you a head start. I will stop the guards.” she smiled and held out her hand to me. If nothing else, at least she's playing fair, not like her uncle. But I still think he has the upper hand.
"How much time do I have before that gate closes?"
“About ten minutes.”
"How far is it?"
"A few hundred meters, but you have to zigzag between people. Turn right at the corner and run along the wall to the gate. It cannot be overlooked.” she explained. The smile almost disappeared from her face. It dawned on her that our chances are even. And I don't want to lose. She always keeps her word, so my reward would be everything I've wanted to know for quite some time. I would finally have some answers. And a plan could be devised with them. "Ready?" she asked, I nodded. I have no idea what awaits me, but I never have that with her. So why bother?
Andrea counted down the start of our race and let time start running around us again. I wonder what she herself has planned. When I ran, she stood still with a smile on her face. She has to leave enough time to catch up with me. She knows I won't be as fast as I hope. And that she has to outrun all those people and me.
The street in front of me - although quite wide - is just teeming with people. They are quite a problem for me. They squish each other and won't let me run properly. I made my way through the first few groups on the corner pretty quickly. After that, my progress slowed down. That's why she offered to delay the guards. It's her memory! She knows very well where all those people will be and she probably knows the fastest route. That's not fair at all. I left another stall behind, a spiky fruit, about the size of my fist, got in my way, I just had to grab it and shove it into the hand of a passing woman. I haven't seen such crowds of people in a long time, last time in Ecrana, but there were a lot more people there.
I have a head start on her then, because she's even worse at breaking through crowds than I am. So, if there were suddenly more people here, it would give me an even better chance of getting where I need to go. And closer to telling me everything I really care about. So far she’s just trying to discourage me from everything. I like the idea of immortality with her and she's going to have to understand that.
Another fruit stand? How many are here? I almost had to stop to avoid a group of people choosing the fruit with the most attractive green colour. I don't like any of the shades, they are all too dark and remind me of periwinkle, but I took advantage of the fact that I slowed down. Editing her memory is ridiculously easy, crowds of people have grown behind me and with any luck will give me enough of a head start.
The second jingle put me back in the race. I'm just approaching the corner of the damn building and my watch is running out of time. I thought the jingles were spaced at equal intervals, but if I had ten minutes to go all the way and seven had already passed, the gate would close in three minutes. I cursed and spun around with it, I really want to look back and see where she is. She must be running too, and if she knows her way around here like I assume, she'll show up behind me at any moment. That is, behind me and all those people who appeared here at my command. But seriously, how much can such a cheap trick slow down someone like her.
I finally got to a bit of an open area. The gate is already waiting in front of me, with the iron grate still up. One of those thick, pretty heavy gates, very likely with runes under the paint. And I better damn well move if I don't want it to crush me. An said it’s a few hundred meters, I would say much further. So either her estimate isn't worth much or I'm out of practice.
I run as fast as I can and even then it seems to me that the hole in the walls is impossibly far away. The first clink made me look back. I know she's behind me, I can hear her footsteps, I just don't know how far. She's closer than I expected, only a few meters behind me, and like an idiot I slow down to look back. She almost caught up with me on the second jingle. We're running right next to each other when the final, third ding - and the gate starts to lower. It’s literally in front of us, no more than ten meters away. She should slow down, I should slow down. But the deal is that we have to get past the gate. Stopping in front of the bars is of no use to me. I grabbed the sleeves of my jacket to keep them from rolling up and with the leather firmly in my hand I loosened my knees and slid down. She did the exact same thing just a little while later.
The iron grate landed with a heavy click. I'm in. In a cloud of swirling dust, on dirty tiles covered in sand, completely out of breath. I'm in! We are. Both. I won. I slipped earlier. I won. Again. "It is fun." I admitted with a laugh. I can't see her next to me, she must have slipped further.
"I won." I heard her before I saw her. She moved up, closer to me as she repeated, "I won." and again she stopped everything around us, which I recognized mainly by the particles of dust that stopped instead of drifting to the ground. I don't want to know why. I don't want to run anywhere anymore.
"It's a tie, we're both here." I turned my head to her with a smile.
"I was here first and besides," she frowned at me. "you cheated." that's a pretty unfair accusation. She caught up with me without any problems.
"I just made us even." I put on my crooked smile. She can never get upset and gives up. "I think we won both."
Andrea threw off her jacket, raised herself on her elbows, and sat on top of me, as she is wont to do. Not that I want to complain, I like it when she does that. Especially when she leans towards me like she does now. I don't like lying to myself and even though I know how smart and funny and everything else I normally appreciate she is, I can't ignore the obvious. How sexy she is in that tank top. Sweat has stuck the fabric to her skin and not a single part of her body remains hidden. "Alright, first my reward and then yours." she announced triumphantly. I don't know if her reward is for her or for me. What am I going to do with her all evening and all night…
"I have to apologize to dad, he's going to be furious."
"Come on, he's a grown up. He’ll make it." she straightened up so I could have a perfect view of her curves. I have to check them with my hands, caress them. “And he's smart enough to figure out what you're doing. He has so many mistresses that he can certainly understand why.”
“First of all, ouch,” of course she's right, but even with all those mistresses, he's still my father. "secondly, you are seriously an awful person." I laughed and held up another finger. "and thirdly, I have to go."
“Don't you care a bit about what's going on here? Why did we run all this way?” she knows very well that I care. I just don't want to keep putting off my responsibilities. Not that I would ever avoid something important. "Are you really that eager to have dinner with Edgar?"
"I can't lie to you." I should definitely try it sometime. Just to see if she can tell.
"You wouldn't be the first, nor the last, to try." she got off me, stood up in that crazy tight tank top and gave me her hand. “It's up to you, Steeles. Naturally."
I could simply say that I promised her a whole week with me, but the truth is that I don't want to go back one bit. If I have to choose a night with her or lessons from him, I take An. No question. "Why are we here?" I stood up even without her help. An smirked but said nothing.
“There's Adrian in the building opposite, on the bottom floor. It's been a few years since I came here for him. He got there when he was trying to get his sister out of town, a few hours after the coup. I helped her, but he didn't know about it. I was looking for her all this time, this city belonged to them, to her family, he wanted to get her out of here, but he didn't quite succeed." she pointed with her hand to the courtyard between the gate we are standing at and the building we needed to get to. “This is currently the equivalent of a prison and a well-guarded one as far as this courtyard is concerned.” she had to let time run again and I didn't notice until two groups of guards approached us. Neither one of us has a weapon, An doesn't matter one bit, it worries me a little. I don't like fighting with my bare hands. I don't care what other people say, punching someone doesn't hurt just the recipient. "I probably don't have to tell you, but don't get injured. It won't hurt you in the real world, but here it hurts a lot.”
Before I could object, a group of six men headed towards us from the left and another from the right. I carefully prepared a blue ball of energy that I could send towards them and deprive one of them of their weapon. She just ran towards them with bare hands and, in my opinion, zero plan. She never bothers to plan anything, she just lets herself be guided by what the situation brings. I quite admire it. And it scares me just the same. Just like that she ran and brought the first of them to her knees with magic. I couldn't follow the rest of her genius attack. I sent an orb from my hand to the nearest target, followed by another.
The first one smashed quite harmlessly against the shield of the first man in line. It didn't hurt him, but left a nice hole in the shield. The other one hit the man next to him in the chest, leaving a hole there. Big and rather disgusting. The last ball I managed to send before they got too close hit another in the thigh. I effectively knocked two out of six out of the fight. Which is not a bad result or rather a subtotal.
I knocked out the sword of the hand of the nearest one and ducked. I hit something, or rather someone, I had to jump aside before I could check the extent of the injury. With the extra space I was able to send another ball to the next target, I heard a scream but like before, I didn't have time to look. I saw another one out of the corner of my eye, I stuck my sword into his stomach and didn't even bother to pull it out. I just took the one he won't need anymore.
I can't even remember when I could use spells so freely and not think about the consequences. Another guard fell to his knees, a sharp volley of magical shards hitting him in several places. As soon as I released the spell, the sharp spikes disappeared, leaving only a series of badly bleeding open wounds. I stopped counting how many were left, I just turned, the blade coming towards me. I had no chance to cover it, I had to jump aside. He seemed to be ready for it, as he immediately attacked again. My borrowed blade stopped his. He leaned against me, tried to push me over and quite succeeded. I'm going to have to back off again and hope he settles down a bit more slowly.
"Jump!" she rushed in with a forceful command. It sounds like total bullshit to me. I believe she has a plan. At least this time. I did exactly what she wanted. The guard in front of me straightened quickly. An slammed her fist into the ground and shouted something. A strong wave threw everyone standing on the hot sand in the immediate vicinity. She laughed quietly, enjoying herself as much as I did. In the real world, such a fighting style cannot be fully applied. There is always someone around who can come to harm, and that leads to an awful lot of problems and paperwork. I quickly pulled her back to her feet.
"I guess you don't want a weapon." I asked with a laugh.
"I don't particularly want it." she replied with a slight smile. She took a slow breath and sent another red-hot ball from her hand. "I didn't have any weapons then either, I just can't remember where I left it." she laughed again. In the heat of battle, it suits her exceptionally well. She can say what she wants, but to fight alongside her for the rest of eternity… that's just a dream. "We have to get to that door, there are more coming." she's right, we started with twelve and now there are fifteen.
Another monent and they will surround us. I almost touch her back. I grab her forearm before she prepares for another attack. I took us both behind the wall of guards, closer to the door. "What's next?" I asked with a sword in one hand and a glowing orb in the other. Ready for when the first one turns around. But not one of them did it, on the contrary, they are moving away from us.
"Go," doesn't sound very convincing. “Run!” she repeated more urgently. She pulls my hand, half turned. She's waiting for something.
The first green line whizzed through the cloudless blue sky. Andrea caught the dart in flight and swept it aside with a wave of her hand. It dawned on me that our only hope is that door. I don't need her explanation, those arrows are poisoned.
The closed door didn't surprise her as much as it did me. She only started cursing when she noticed the runes on them. We took turns, I was deflecting the arrows, of which there were more and more, she was playing with the rune. “That combination makes no sense! There's a five that leads to nothing!” she complained. "What the fuck is my family's problem!"
“Stop it, calm down and,” a loud bang cut me off.
"Got it." she said proudly. “Get in.” her clear instructions are difficult to follow. The green arrows keep increasing. More and more cross the sky. I feel her hand on my shoulder, pulling me in, we both deflect arrows to the side. Andrea got ahead of me. Even in her own memory, she is so worried about me that she has to stand in front of me. It kind of spoils the atmosphere.
I went into the corridor, she stayed outside. She was only there for a little while. I heard her scream. She ran inside, slammed the door and secured it with a charm. She leaned her back against the wood, holding her right hand, she doesn't seem to be bleeding. "I will seriously kill him!" she shouted angrily. She grabbed a piece of strange, glass-like material and tore it from her hand. Another curse from her was partially masked by the sound of shattering glass as she let go of the sharp object. It must have been some kind of crystal, infused with who knows what.
"Whom?" I carefully examined the wound on her hand. The edges burn red, but the small puncture does not bleed. She covered the wound with her own palm when she pulled it away, it was still there. She can't heal here and she's as surprised as I am.
“Jim, those arrows are…” my eyebrows shot up. Did she mean they were poisoned? I figured. "It doesn't matter."
"We're on Lemford, aren't we?" I know the answer to my question. We can't be anywhere else. I covered the wound on her hand with a piece of bandage.
“Right in the heart of the casino.” she confirmed. “We have to hurry if I can't heal, I only have a few minutes before the poison spreads. So listen to me, we need to get Adrian out. There were no guards back then, but I don't know what changed. Just be careful." she headed to the bowels of the dark corridor, the light walls completely insufficiently reflecting the light from several lamps, placed too far apart. It's not a very cleverly lit prison.
"Suddenly it makes more sense how Emmett got here so quickly." I grunted, almost hurt. The trip to Lemford normally takes a day or so by boat. She took us here by a much faster route. About which I know nothing, because I lived under the belief that everyone gets here by boat. While the Hales could get away with such a rule, the others could not.
“You said it yourself that we don't seem like the kind of family that enjoys walking." she speaks softly, this made me grip the sword hilt a little tighter. "You don't think we're going to waste time on ships, do you?" she objected. She didn't smile like usual. She squeezes her injured hand spasmodically. It worries me quite a bit. Maybe I should suggest we go back now. As much as I enjoy this trip down memory lane, she can tell me the rest. “Edgar knows the shortcut too, so I'm guessing he doesn't want his little boy wandering the dangerous streets of Lemford all alone and unsupervised."
“I'm not a little kid." I shook my head with an icy voice.
"No, but I don't think he cares one bit." I frowned even more, it's not my fault I wasn't born decades ago like everyone else. She leaned against the door and carefully opened it. "Don't frown like that, you look like Jonathan. Speaking of which," she lowered her voice a bit again on the way down the stairs. She frowned as if thinking something over and added. "I'm about eighteen times your age, and he and your father still treat me like a little girl. I don't think you're going to change that, no matter what you do."
"Great… and I took the stupid shiny circle." it's not worth fighting, but it annoys me. What do I have to do to prove to him that I'm not a child? Should I run away from his reach for a few years like Emmett? Or should I obediently follow his every command from the table like Luke? Or I can try doing nothing at all like Lucille…
The stone steps beneath our feet are slippery just from the look, leading us deeper into a dangerous looking, even darker corridor. There's such an ominous atmosphere here, I'd swear there's someone waiting for us down there. She looked at me with the same concern as I looked at her. She put her fingers to her lips. She treads quietly beside me. She leaned her shoulder against another door, this one must lead to our destination. The new corridor ahead is full of reinforced doors, cells. Andrea gasped next to me, cursed softly, started wringing her hand again. I heard footsteps approaching before I could ask what was going on. "Give me the sword," she demanded breathlessly.
“No, you can't even write xour name with your left hand." I laughed softly. I pushed past her and went to deal with it. Two guards are approaching us. I sent the first one straight to the ground with the help of magic. I left a borrowed sword in the second of them.
An leaned her back against the wall next to the last door on the right. I thought she was waiting for me to come back to her place, but back at her place I feel like she doesn't even want to come in. The door opened by itself, suspiciously quietly. No creaks, clicks, nothing. Just a silent, perfectly adjusted door mechanism. A strong light inside illuminates a square room with nothing but a chained man kneeling on the ground. He looked up as we entered. His unnaturally bright eyes locked on Andrea. Letting go of her injured hand, she fished in her pocket and pulled out a silver pendant with a silver flower pierced by a dagger. "So you found Inalie after all." he spoke with his flawless pronunciation.
I never thought I'd see him like this. I always felt that Adrian was raised in a good family. He talks and acts differently than the other Guardsmen. I can stand to discuss the current political situation with him for several hours and I can only admire his opinions, but he is equally well versed in books and art. Unlike the other guards who showed no interest in such areas. That's why I always thought he joined her based on his abilities, not because he felt he owed her anything.
"I did," she answered him. The pain is gone from her voice. Just like that. Just like that?
“So it's over." Adrian lowered his gaze.
"No, quite the opposite." she took a few steps towards him, bent down. "I said I just wanted to talk to her, I gave you my word."
"A lot of people gave me their word."
“A lot of people aren't like me." she answered him with a slight smile. Wait a minute. “Your sister is safe." the chains hit the ground with a loud thud.
"Safe?" he wondered, shaking his head in disbelief. At the same time, he slowly discovers his newly charged freedom. He stretched his arms, the stiff muscles in his shoulders and back, and tried to straighten up. I helped him to his feet before he fell back to the ground. I suppose she would have done it herself under different circumstances, but she didn't, she just stood in front of him. I backed Adrian against the wall and returned to her.
How did she get on the ground and why do I feel like she's been there longer than I'd like?
"Anie?" she mumbled something, I don't understand a single word. She gasped again. I bent down to her. I definitely can't take care of both of them. She's all on fire and he's not real. She took a shallow gasp and it freaked me out. "We'll get back, okay?" I asked. Andrea didn't answer. But she's sane enough to bring us back on her own.
Why not…
I can only hold her and wait for her to catch her breath again. The wound on her hand disappeared instantly, along with the non-existent bandage. Apparently these are two completely separate worlds. "Anie?" it scares me that I don't know how to help her. I should know. Like when she wakes up in the middle of the night, I can't do anything at all. It ruins me that I can't help her. Neither my power nor how much I love her is enough. I just can't do it. "You'll be okay?" I asked after she let go of me and sat on the ground next to me.
"Yeah," she nodded without looking at me. She anxiously avoids my gaze with her own hands around her neck. "I hate it when Jim changes those memories. Especially like this, he's trying to force me to deal with everything." she whispered, still holding her neck. Why is she doing it? What is she afraid of?
"An?" I carefully grabbed her hands and pulled them off her neck. Her grasp is very firm, with much more strength in it than I expected. She's frightened. Her fingers left red marks on her skin. I don't want her to be so scared all the time. She can talk about her fear. She can tell me what she's so afraid of. It would definitely be better than Damien's attempts to force her to face it. Whatever it is. Some kind of poison that will take her breath away? "It's the same fear that keeps waking you up."
"I do not want to talk about it." she tried to stop me quickly. She's out of luck. I'm here. And I need to understand it. Like everything else.
“You can't avoid it all the time. I raised her head with my hand so that she had to look into my eyes. “I don't want to force you, but I don't want you to keep doing what you're doing because it's clearly not working." the dark eyesfixed on me. She seems surprised. She can't expect me to keep going over it all the time. She would have to explain it to me one day anyway, so why not now. “I don't claim to understand, but you can tell me."
"Steven…" she smiled sadly and stood up. The environment around us has changed again. We are standing on the balcony of one of the large suites in the main casino building. It must be her apartment. The view of the entire island from here is literally breathtaking. And everything around is bright white and typically Hale.
She leaned against the high railing, her back to the colorful city, she met my gaze. I'm patiently waiting to see what she comes up with. "It's easier just not to think about it. To avoid it. The truth is, I don't want to face it. I don't want to think about any of it." she folded her arms. Only now did I realize she isn't wearing a jacket. Her tank top is as clean as when we got here, but the jacket is gone. Did it stay in her memory? Is it even possible? How do these worlds of theirs work? I should ask that sometime. But not now. "I can find other's greatest fear. Not that I mean to be cruel, the sooner you figure out what you're afraid of, the sooner you can get rid of that fear. Or at least that's how it started, my perfect talent I didn't ask for. The irony is that I can't help myself ."
"That's why I'm here." I walked over to her. I really hope I can help her. I mean, who else? "I can help you if you let me." I'm not under the illusion that a short conversation would make a big difference. That all the years of her bad dreams would disappear and we could go on without it, but damn, I have to help her at least a little. We can open the topic and come back to it gradually. Figure something out. We're supposed to be the most powerful people on this bloody rock. "Are you afraid of suffocating?" I finally asked the burning question. I've been wanting to ask her this for months. Ever since I've known her, actually. What scares her so much that she can't get rid of it even in her sleep?
"No, I'm not afraid of dying. Death would be an easy way out. It usually is. My body would be taken away by Daniel and I'd wake up at home. What I hate," she bit her lip. She's looking for the right words. "what scares me is the feeling that I can't stop." I frowned in confusion. I'm getting lost in it. What does she want to stop? The memories?
"I don't understand you, An."
"I've spent enough time with the Twins, way too much, not that the decision was up to me or I could change it in any way, but still." how much time she actually spent with them against her will. She said it had been weeks. She couldn't stop any of it for weeks? But what? It's clear to me that they didn't just talk and bond like a family, which they're not. I feel my heart race, my stomach tighten in contrast. She spent several weeks all alone, with them. With someone she's really afraid of. And even the most powerful family couldn't bring her back?
"It wasn't that bad at first, they wanted information about one spell or rather a ritual and I didn't feel like telling them anything." I didn't even move as brown eyes locked on me. I need her to tell me and I don't want to hear it at the same time. I know for sure I don't want to. Her composure is definitely gone. Wasn't it terrible? How could it? It seems pretty terrible to me. Even worse. Before I was afraid if she could ever confide with me, now I'm starting to fear that I'm not ready to hear it. Just the thought of someone trying to hurt her scares me, makes me sick and angry at the same time. And I ask for details? "It started off quite innocent, they couldn't afford to kill me and a few broken boneseamt very little to me. I thought I was just playing for time, but they kept coming up with more and more creative torture methods and my rescue wasn't coming."
I gritted my teeth, sickened at the thought of all they could have done to her. She's small and fragile, with or without powers, she's the only one who doesn't deserve something like this. She has nothing to do with them. She became a victim in her family's war. They were hurting her because of an old grievance. This time I bit my lip hard.
Unfortunately, my imagination did not fail me. The thought of a single broken bone of hers angers and hurts me, a single gash on a perfect body drives me insane. How many of all the scars that she hides so carefully, she got from them. When she was all alone. And she hasn't gotten to the worst yet. I know it didn't stop there and I probably don't want to hear it. "It took a while for them to come up with something… nastier, something that really bothered me. It still bothers me. The idea… he let me suffocate with my own blood. For hours at a time. And he always let me breathe just for a little while, right before I passed out, just so he could continue…” she trailed off. She twirls her lion head ring nervously. I want to stop her, grab her hands, but I can't move. My body has stopped and refuses to move again. I can only replay the scene she described in my head. I don't even need the details, I imagined it vividly enough.
"Day after day he repeated the same endlessly sticky hot show of mortality. Over and over again. He asked me a question… and then he touched me. Gently, as if he wanted to caress me. With a cruel smile… his hands are as icy as mine. I don't know why. I remember his touch, it was so gentle, drawing a single rune on my forearm. And when he pulled that hand away, everything else disappeared," that's what she showed me in the old mansion. It's not just my imagination anymore that scares me. It's her memory and now mine too. Of how the oxygen in the lungs just disappears. And all that's left is an emptiness that can't be replaced by anything. Only a new breath that doesn't come. "I didn't hurt, I was looking for a way to stop it, run away from it somewhere, like you run away from pain. But there's something about not being able to breathe... your own body makes you think of the only thing you need to breathe in. You panic and you can't change it. And when your lungs and mouth are full of your own blood that you can't get rid of, it will fill you with a whole new sense of helplessness and despair. It wasn't about fear." she speaks completely calm, she stopped twirling the ring. The only thing that can tell me is a tear that went down her face all by itself. A single tear full of pain. I, on the other hand, have a feeling that I'm going to cry a river soon. The thought of it all makes me sick. Helpless and desperate. "It just paralyzes you."
"That's enough," I asked quietly. I pulled her to me, into my arms. To the only place that seems at least somewhat safe to me. This time I'm careful not to suffocate her, I just hold her. More for my sake than for hers. I can't stop my own thoughts, the frantic beating of my own heart, or the terrible feeling. She has no idea how much a few sentences hurt me. I would never have thought of it myself. How could Jonathan let it go so far? I would do anything to change what happened to her. Anything. And I have nothing.
I have nothing to offer her but my arms. A crown has no value here, and neither does my power. And yet, when she's with me, I feel like she's so much calmer when she's with me. The longer we are together, the less bad dreams she has - the faster she falls asleep and the less she wakes up. She is safe in my arms. It's the only place I know she belongs to. Andrea belongs to me. Into my life, as I into hers. And I have to do something, I believe that I can change something, at least a small part of what she is running away from. "Anie, close your eyes."
"What?" she asked in surprise.
“Just dp it." I insisted. She looked at me in disbelief and closed her eyes. "Okay, now take a slow breath."
"Steven, I-"
"An," I admonished her in a sterner tone. "trust me and breathe slowly." she shook her head resignedly, she has to listen to me, I know she trusts me. I smiled slightly as she inhaled and exhaled. "Again." I prodded her. I gently kissed her cheek, she laughed softly. "Again." I repeated and kissed her forehead. I'm not saying it's a good exercise, but I have a feeling it might help her. Just to make her realize she's not alone. And she can tell me anything. "I don't claim to make you free from that fear, or that I'll always be by your side to help you. Such a promise feels like a lie to me. But try to remember this, this moment, whenever you feel like you're trapped with your memories. Remember the two of us, that you can breathe with me. That I'll always be somewhere waiting for you no matter what. Remember me, how much I love you." I whispered to her. "Because my world is not complete without you in it. Because we have a future together that no one can take away, not even your past."
"As if it was that simple…" she whispered, burying her head in my chest. I find her so fragile when she does that, adorably unimportant. Like a little girl.
"It's pretty simple when you think about it." I have to stand up for myself, she shook her head dismissively. “Between everything we do. Among all the contracts we sign, among all the people who rely on us, among everything that has happened and will happen, the two of us are the easiest thing.”
Andrea raised her head, looked at me, thinking that I lost it. "That's such awful nonsense, Steven." still looking at me she started laughing. I needed to hear this exact laugh. I needed to see her smile. I need that feeling to come back that assures me that we can make absolutely anything work. Because if not, then what's the point ? "I'd rather kick Jim's ass."
"Well, we're at the casino, you can drop by." I joined her laughter. The thought of how she handles it with Damien amuses me. The longer I know him, the more I like Jonathan. He is much more reliable of the two brothers and seems to me to be smarter, but I can't verify that in any way. Yet.
"Jim is not here. I don't know for sure when he will return." and her smile is gone again. I want to ask where he is. I'm so curious, but I've already tortured her enough with my questions. “I know what you want to ask, but I'm not sure where he actually is… on the other hand,” the sweet smile returned. "when Jim is not here, nor Jonathan and Stephan, we have the whole of Lemford to ourselves." she turned without letting go of me.
“It's a nice view.” below us is a flood of colourful banners and bright lights on fairly straight streets. The whole island does not deviate even a little from the series of their representative residences. It is a place full of fun and pleasure in their style. Scattered groups of people enjoy all that Lemford has to offer, meandering through the wide streets with each other, each on their way to a different pleasure. Clubs, exotic shops, absolutely unique buildings and exhibitions or a casino, there is nothing missing here. Visitors have absolutely everything at their disposal and can let the island's employees grant them any wish, be it ordinary or a bit twisted. Words not possible simply don't exist here. Illusions complete what cannot be arranged in the traditional way. “Now that we're alone here, away from my Council, Cormier, and Muriel, tell me how someone can just claim an entire island." I find that question as ridiculous as our entire debate on the subject. But I can ask.
"Sometimes I feel like it's our greatest achievement. We've really accomplished something here as a family. Although Damien takes care of the island, the four of us really love this place." she spoke after a while. "Zessia, powerful and majestic as it is, is always full of pressing matters, constantly demanding our attention. I know Lemford is only a small island compared to it, but here the established rules never change. By entering the island, everyone agrees that they answer directly to us. And it doesn't matter who it is." I know the rules very well, everything is governed by the wishes of the Heirs and any behaviour contrary to their wishes is not tolerated. One of them could easily kill me here if I did something wrong and no one could object. Elsewhere they at least bother with the theater about it being an accident or something, but not here. In short, Lemford is a place like no other and their word here really is the law. On the other hand, they are usually not talked down to anywhere else. It can't be that special for them.
"Yeah, you're keeping it pretty simple here." it's quite strange considering that everyone visits this island mainly to have fun. However, the loyalty of the locals cannot be questioned.
"The main thing is that people accept us quite differently, but you would hardly understand that in your mortal body. Do you want to go down?" probably for the first time I'm on Lemford, I don't need to go among all those people. I just want to stay with her. Seize her, capture her for a few hours and not share her attention.
"How exactly did we get here?" I asked another question instead of an answer.
“Similar to the Senate, there is a bridge." she turned back to me. "I'd show you around, but I can't let you roam Lemford unsupervised. It's such a dangerously debauched place." she laughed.
“True, one of us must be the responsible one." she grabbed my hand. She would always go somewhere and show me things that I don't even care about. "Where are we going, can't we just stay here?" I stopped at the big bed, I can't find better entertainment here anyway.
"First you want to know all my secrets and then you don't. I have to show you how to get here if you ever need Jim." she stopped at the closet. She pulled out one of the white coats. I almost forgot that she only has to wear this colour here. "You're so complicated for someone from the North."
"How many times do I have to tell you I'm not from the North?" I fought back with a laugh. Once I have the mark of Athran on my ring, I must be one of them. Narvin may be in Atrhan, but I belong to the South in every way. I took the coat from her hand and threw it away. We're not going anywhere. Not tonight. "And I always thought I am too simple. All I need is you."
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